Monday, September 6, 2010

Internet Weirdness...

Okay, I just found out that somebody has been using an internet "handle" of mine as their own. Truly a bit of weirdness. I don't know if they saw it and liked it or came up with it on their own.

It made for an interesting day of changing passwords and email addresses as well as scanning my PC for any malware - none found.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Update on Friday the 13th

Well, I know when I have to go to court but I'm not looking forward to it. I need to go back to the scene and see if there's anything there that will help me. I know what the road used to look like before construction began and I have Google maps pre-construction to back me up. Might need to take a day-trip through the accident scene with a video camera mounted on the dash.

Of course there is a way I may not have to go to court. If I receive a ticket in the mail with a bail forfeiture amount, I'll pay that. I just hope it's not too high. The accident is on my record now anyway and I can't avoid the insurance hit.

I still don't have a clear memory of the accident. Just bits and pieces. The turn just before the accident, then impact. Nothing in between. The Deputy said I ran a red light. I have no way of knowing.

It will be three weeks tomorrow since the accident.

My chest is still sore from the seatbelt...

Friday, August 20, 2010

Music, Carpentry, Electricity, Car Wreck

I have really appreciated the extra work I could do with our keyboard player. It's just he and I and we were sounding a lot like a pick up band there for a while. We have been putting in a few extra hours and have developed a few medleys as well as some new music. Everything is sounding better now. I added an amp for my guitar as well as a microphone so people could hear me play and sing otherwise the piano (upright, not electric) drowns me out. I can play softer now and don't have to "scream" sing.

I have been helping him with some light carpentry and electrical around his house. Extending an existing circuit to add two shop lights and a fan in the garage and tapping in to another to add outlets along the garage wall. More light and cooler now in the garage. There is still a storage closet to add, but I just about have the plans drawn up.

The physical activity stopped cold last Friday when we were in a traffic accident. No permanent damage to either of us and we are on the mend. He with two broken toes, me with a severe rub from the airbag on my chest and arm along with bruised ribs from impacting the seat belt. I looked back on the wreck a couple of days after and realized we could have been killed had there not been seat belts and airbags. As it was I was stunned pretty badly at the time and I still don't remember much leading up to the accident. This is the first time I've been able to sit for a long period and type. I am healing nicely and quickly however. The fast pace has to be because of God's grace and mercy.

Writer's block

... I rest my case.

Monday, April 5, 2010

"Family"

That's an interesting (and now confusing) term. The traditional meaning of the term "family" doesn't exist in my life any more with the passing of my mother back in 2001. I have people tell me I'm "family" but I don't know what they mean.

Yesterday was Easter. The most important holiday in Christendom. Many in my "family" got together with each other for Easter Dinner and/or activities. My Easter Dinner consisted of leftovers from Saturday and fruit from this morning. My activities consisted of flipping channels on TV but nothing on to watch; filling out my unemployment claim form and taking it to the post office; coming back and looking again for something to watch. Had some movies I haven't seen yet but wasn't in the frame of mind to appreciate them. I was doing everything I could to distract myself from the fact that I was spending the holiest day in the faith alone. I had nobody to share a meal or do something with in celebration of His resurrection.

This whole thing reminds me of a song on Jennifer Knapp's Kansas CD named "Faithful to Me". The line in the chorus is, "You're the only One Who's faithful to me." That is true. Jesus is the only One Who has been faithful to me. Even when I haven't been faithful to Him. When I wind up alone on days like yesterday, I remember that song and wish Jesus had some skin around Him for the day. An actual, physical, human being I could talk with.

Like I said earlier, my mom was my traditional/natural (and later spiritual) family and we always got together on Easter whether for dinner or spending the day together. I remember those days as wonderful even when it was just small talk and overeating. Those days are gone now.

I'm sure the people who've told my I'm "family" mean well but it seems some holidays I am "family" and on others I'm not. The holidays I'm not "family" hurt...

Could somebody please tell me what the hell "family" means?

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

If not me, who? If not now, when?

Thought I'd borrow a line from the President's speech yesterday. He borrowed it from a Reagan speech who quoted Rabbi Hillel (30BC - 9AD). Actually, Regan paraphrased Rabbi Hillel.

I've been finding myself writing my Senators, Congressman, as well as the President. So far I've heard back from Senators Boxer and Feinstein and President Obama. Boxer blamed the problems with health care reform on the Republicans efforts to block the Senate bill. The President thanked my for my letter and proceeded to talk past what I said to say why the bill was so important. The only thing Senator Feinstein replied to was the anti-trust exemption the insurance companies now enjoy. There is a bill (S. 1681) to fix that but it's still in committee. A House bill has been passed.

The health care summit was a pathetic joke. The President took the opportunity to "listen to" and "educate" the Republicans. He promised to include Republican ideas. Those ideas wound up as pilot programs. Who wants to bet the "pilot programs" will never come to anything. "We tried but it didn't work". End result: Only the Democrat plans will be enacted. Once again: My way or the highway.

The President admitted there were serious problems with the bill but that they could be fixed. He didn't say what but I can: The Cornhusker kickback, the Louisiana purchase, his deal with the drug companies. Congressman Weiner accused the Republicans of being a wholly owned subsidiary of the insurance companies. Using his logic, I can confidently state the White House is the wholly owned subsidiary of Big Pharma.

I don't know where this activism came from... Oh, yes I do. The President's policy is to change health care into a socialist system. I am reminded of what is written in the Bible about letting those who would eat, work. The entire passage is 2Thess 3:6 to 2Thess 3:12. That's not socialism. That's personal responsibility. It galls me when the government thinks they know better than I do what my personal responsibilities are.

Message to my Congressman

It appears the Health Care Bill is trying to live. Promises the Senate bill will be "fixed" by the Senate adding a new bill will not be kept. Senator DeMint has said any attempt can and will be blocked by a filibuster. Only minor changes are allowed in reconciliation.

Be very sure of two things:

1. The Senate bill is a terrible bill.

2. You will not be re-elected if you vote in favor. I will do everything I can to see you are not re-elected.

Very sincerely,

Nicholas H. Brown

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Meaningful and Affordable Health Care reform

I sent the following letter to Congressman Bob Filner, Senators Feinstein and Boxer, as well as the President.

+ + + + +

The main costs of health care are the premiums. A good place to start lowering health insurance premiums is by encouraging competition:

1) Get rid of the insurance companies' anti-trust exemption. There will be competition if they can't fix the premiums at whatever level they choose.

2) Allow individuals and companies to buy insurance from any insurance company in the country. Individuals and companies will be sole decider as to which company they purchase insurance from, not the federal government. Individuals and companies will have the right to terminate coverage and choose a different policy at any time for any reason. The federal government will have no say in this. A good model for this is California's auto insurance system. I can change auto insurance providers at any time.

3) Individuals will be allowed to keep their insurance no matter where they move to or where they work. The federal government will not have a say in this beyond the enactment of this item.

4) Individuals and companies will be the sole arbiters as to what is affordable coverage, not the federal government.

5) Maximum pre-existing condition premium differential will remain at 130 percent as it is in the now dead bill.

Cost to the taxpayer so far: $0.00

End the current form of health savings plan. Make it a plan I can set up on my own and all the money I put in stays in until I use it. Currently any of my money that I don't use goes to waste. After a year, I lose whatever is in the account and have to start over. That is unacceptable which is why I don't have a health savings plan and won't get one until I have total control over it.

Cost to the taxpayer: What ever the taxpayer decides to put into the new health savings plan.

Unacceptable in new bill:

DO NOT under ANY circumstance include an individual mandate in any new bill. The auto insurance mandate in the state of California gives me an out. If I drive in the state of California, I am required to purchase auto insurance. If I can't afford or don't want to buy auto insurance, I can sell my car and take public transportation. That keeps me out of jail and alive. Under the individual mandate in the now dead health care bill, if I don't want or can't afford insurance my only options are jail or suicide. No one has the right to force me into that choice least of all the federal government.

Permitted contents of new bill:

Under no circumstances will the new bill be a "Christmas tree" bill with a lot of non-health related pork/earmarks. Every item in the bill will deal directly with health care and be voted on individually.

The bill will be fewer than 500 pages and written in plain English and posted on-line for 72 hours so all who want can read it.

If you can't get everything into 500 pages, split it up between two or more bills. Should that be required, the on-line viewing time will be 72 hours per bill with the viewing times running consecutive to each other so that all bills can be read.

While I am sure there were some good ideas in the now dead original health care bill, I can't abide the backroom "deals" that were used to buy votes. The most notorious being the "Louisiana Purchase" of Senator Landrieu and the "Cornhusker Kickback" to Senator Ben Nelson of Nebraska. What other vote buying deals are in this "behind closed doors" monstrosity? One is too many which is why this bill is dead and will not be resurrected. What ever happened to transparency? What happened to showing the entire process on C-Span?

As I said before, the current health care bill is dead. No attempt will be made by you to resurrect it. Every effort will be made by you to keep it from coming back to life. Keeping your seat in the House depends on this. I am very serious about this. In case you haven't noticed, the entire country has been angered by the way the dead health care bill was created and how votes were bought to pass the bill.

As I have more ideas, I will pass them on.

Sincerely,

Nicholas H. Brown

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Best use of the LOL texting abbreviation...

Triggers, Recognition of Triggers, and Defeat of Triggers

Many times we act because of triggers. Actually it's a reaction to something. Something sets us off and we don't always know what it is. We try to excuse it by saying something like, "Oh, that's just how I am", or, "that's just how they are."

Wrong.

Something happened in the past that caused a wall to be erected. For a time, it can withstand the triggers and we feel we've got it under control, we've got it handled, and it's no longer a problem. Once the wall can no longer stand the strain, it starts to crack. More triggers = more cracking. Slowly. Surely. Until it's back again and you don't know what causes it or how to handle it because you hid it behind the wall. You're left trying to figure out what the latest one is all about.

Kind of where I am right now. I have no idea how many walls I've put up but I do know they range all the way back to childhood. I may not get them all dealt with right away but I do know that I want to deal with them. I've learned how to recognize when it's time to deal with one because of how I feel. It's a new feeling that I've never felt in the past. The first time had to do with how my dad died. That took a good two months to deal with. Since then they have lasted shorter but that's no guarantee they will continue to be in the future.

I do have to give thanks to God for His Holy Spirit. It is the Holy Spirit Who has been leading me to the truth as my counselor and guide. He has taken me through things with patience and love and without condemnation. I have dealt with things calmly without feeling a need to beat myself up. Burdens have been lifted.

It seems a slow process at times but it is a process. Walls are falling down. I'm moving forward.

Sunday, January 31, 2010

the road less traveled...

I search for the road less traveled.
It is the road I seek to walk.
I search for the road less traveled.
No confusion no idle talk.

A road of truth and wonder.
The road that takes me through
A life torn asunder
And leads me to You.

I cannot comprehend You
Your mercy and Your grace.

I do not seek Your hand.

I want to see Your face.


How dimly I understood
What Your Son did for me.
My heart accepted this gift of life
And then I began to see.

He picked me up and carried me
He carried me through
He said, “Father,
This child belongs to You.”

I cannot comprehend You
Your mercy and Your grace.

I do not seek Your hand.

I want to see Your face.


How many times I’ve failed You
I do not know.
My “humanity” fails me always
And there You help me grow.

I’ve been set apart by Your Son
I know You had Your reason
I know You love me always
No matter what my season.

I cannot comprehend You
Your mercy and Your grace.

I do not seek Your hand.

I want to see Your face.


You picked me up and carried me

You carried me through

And said, “Father,

This child belongs to You”

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Obamacare?

Actually, it's not Obamacare, It's Reid/Pelosi care. David Axelrod and Larry Summers went to Capitol Hill with the President's plan. It had bi-partisan support but Reid and Pelosi told Axelrod and Summers that the Congress would create health care "reform" by itself.

Many things the President proposed were good. The Reid/Pelosi cabal would have none of it. They felt they had the votes to do it their way without any outside interference from the President or the Republicans. As a result of deal making and vote buying like the "Louisiana Purchase" of Senator Landrieu and the "Cornhusker Kickback" to Senator Nelson, we now have this monstrosity of a "health care" bill that really doesn't reform health care like was promised. Instead this bill drives millions of Americans on to the insurance rolls against their will and plants a passionate and sloppy wet kiss on the bare backside of the insurance industry.

Where was the President in all this? He said true health care reform would have a strong public option. This doesn't. No threat of a veto. He said he was against the individual mandate. The individual mandate is there. Again, no threat of a veto. He was saying he wanted health care reform by June. Then August. Then before Christmas. Then by the first of the year. Then by the State of the Union. Yeah, right. He has been AWOL in the process. Part of the process is presidential leadership. He bowed to the Reid/Pelosi cabal and abdicated his leadership. It appears he prefers being the "professor" - a supporting small part player - instead of the President - the leader of this nation. So far, about the only thing the President appears capable of doing is reading a teleprompter. He's very good at that.

Where was Rahm Emmanuel in all of this? He was supposed to be the guy that goes to Capitol Hill and gets things done for the President. He was supposed to be a "pit bull" as the White House Chief of Staff. It appears the Reid/Pelosi cabal has quite easily rendered him little more than a neutered chihuahua.

While there are some good things in this bill, it must die. The first course of action is to enable competition between the insurance companies. End their anti-trust exemption. Televise the vote on C-Span. Anybody who votes against this will have to do so in front of the nation. We will, as the President said, know who is in the back pocket of this special interest.

The next step is allowing everyone to buy insurance across state lines. If the health plan I desire is cheaper and better in another state than what is offered in my state, I want to be able to buy that insurance. That is called competition. It has the effect of forcing insurance companies to lower their rates. Televise this on C-Span as well.

The next item is in the current bill: pre-existing conditions. Vote on it by itself. On C-Span. Apply the current bill's 130 percent limit on premium increase.

Last point: The President said that true health care reform would make insurance affordable for all. Know this: I am the sole arbiter of what I can or cannot afford. Not the President and most definitely not the Reid/Pelosi cabal.

The above actions cost the U.S. taxpayer nothing. Any representative who says otherwise will be declaring themselves to be a liar bought by this special interest.